"If providence did beards devise,
To prove the wearers of them wise,
A fulsome goat would then, by nature,
Excel each other human creature." - Thomas D'Urfey

Saturday, May 4, 2013

A Re-PORT-torial

The scheduled de-port-ation went off without a hitch.  The Goatmother bounced out to the goat barn before I even had my eyes open, which was very nons-port-ing of her, if you ask me.  But I suppose it was im-port-ant that she show up on time.  I mean as op-port-tunistic as some doctors are, they might just go ahead without her.  That would certainly never do.

So no lifting or such like for at least five days.  This has meant that we goats have had to endure the port-entous attentions of the Goatfather since it is a well-known fact that taking care of goats is in no way even remotely related to any activity that could possibly port-ray the lure of a computer.  No.  I'm afraid goat-keeping is very low-tech.

At any rate, we are surviving even though port-ions have been rather slack in the Goatmother's absence.  But that's okay.  I'm sure she'll make up for it once we re-port our evident lack to her.

Now, then.  I'm sure you are all wondering about the appearance of any new Super Powers.  I can honestly say that none have been pur-port-ed to have appeared.  As yet.  I say 'as yet' because I am quite certain something s-port-ive will soon present itself.  Perhaps it will be something exciting like tele-port-ation or maybe something in the trans-port-ation line.  Although I have to admit I'm not too keen on the later as that might mean more trips to the vet somewhere along the way.

Anyway, in the meantime, we will do our very best to sup-port the Goatmother in any way possible.  We are nothing if not accommodating around here.  Goats are SUCH good s-ports.  Or hadn't you noticed?


Terry said...

The PORTly goat brothers wish you all well. They are optimistic, as always, that some good food is on it's way. Did you know that the food chain, 5 Guys Burgers has a box on the counter filled with peanuts, free for the customers? Despite the sign that says, "do not remove peanuts from store because of allergies," the goat boys have gotten a handful now and then. They suggest that the Goatmother celebrate with a burger, as there's not doubt that peanuts will somehow find their way into her pockets.

Marigold said...

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!! No Five Guys Burger joints here!!!!!! OH, NOOOOOO!! Say it isn't so!!!!!!!! Is Washington backward or what?!

Candy C. said...

Thank you for the update, er, I mean re-PORT Marigold! I'm glad things went well for the Goatmother and I'm sure she appreciates all your sup-PORT!! :)

Marigold said...

Dear Candy,
That's right. It IS quite im-PORT-ant.

Claire the Shepherdess said...

We Nova Scotia goats are most anxious to know if the predicted lack of wind superpower has been noted yet? We think this is a tremendous boon to the comPORTment of the goatmother, and might even extend to her flock, if you are lucky! How PORTentious! We might have a glass of that sweet red wine to celebrate, you know, the stuff from PORTugal...oh drat...what IS the name of that stuff?

Marigold said...

Dear Claire,
No evidence of said Super Power as yet. We hope it does not extend too far, or she may need a PORT-a-potty. Now THAT would not be good.

Millie said...

I'm glad you took time to re-PORT this highly im-PORT-ant information! Glad she's making progress.

Marigold said...

Dear Millie,
Exactly. Now on to the new Super Powers. :)

Missy the Goat said...

Whew, I'm sure glad the Goatmother has finally been dePORTed. She really deserved it. And I don't want to ever see her imPORTed again

Marigold said...

Dear Missy,
You can say that again. Or would that be a re-PORT, I mean re-PEAT? :)

Mrs. Micawber said...

Wait. You have to go to the vet? He/she doesn't come to you? Oh for the lost days of the country vet who made barn calls....

One of the Goatmother's Super Powers has certainly rubbed off on you: the ability to work PORT into practically every sentence without straining the text. Nice work! :)

P.S. I'm sure your PORTrayal of the Goatfather as a hander-out of scanty PORTions is disproPORTionate to his innate generosity. I suggest that you start a coffee conversation with him. This will build a good rapPORT and may result in some unexpected (and exceedinly thoughtful) largesse, hopefully of the peanut variety.

P.P.S. I didn't know peanuts had allergies. Apparently the ones in that hamburger chain need to stay a controlled environment. What happens if they leave the store? Do they sneeze?

Marigold said...

Dear Mrs. Micawber,
I know. The medical establishment isn't what it used to be.
As for the Goatfather, I have to admit I'm a little afraid to start a coffee conversation. He could forget all about the Peanuts, getting all waxy poetic about his Aero Press.
And, I suppose Peanuts could have allergies. Perhaps I should get the SnowCatcher to crochet them some tiny little hankies. Wouldn't that be a magnanimous gesture? I certainly think so.

Snowcatcher said...

Congratulations on dePORTation! Now the Snowcatcher must seek the opPORTunity to dig out her passPORT and search her PORTraits and PORTfolio and purPORTedly find the PORTal to create disproPORTionate peanuts whilst crocheting tiny hankies. (and a goat.)

Not near as good as yours!

Marigold said...

Dear SnowCatcher,
Oh, I dunno' about that. ANYTHING that talks about Peanuts is good. Besides, I'd like to see those tiny hankies. Truly I would. :)

Terry said...

Off topic, but I thought of you yesterday, Marigold. I visited a friend to meet his pigs. He is fattening them up on peanuts. The man has boxes of peanuts. For pigs. Thought you'd want to know.

Marigold said...

Dear Terry,
For pigs? What a waste. :)