"If providence did beards devise,
To prove the wearers of them wise,
A fulsome goat would then, by nature,
Excel each other human creature." - Thomas D'Urfey

Friday, January 25, 2008

Jealousy, Thy Name Is Marigold

What's a goat to do? I lead a simple life. I try to be good. Admittedly, I occasionally give into that primal urge to butt something, but not that often. Really. So why is the Universe against me?

Look. Ella is growing a beard. Can you see it? No?

Look closer. Oy. You might remember my post of old - the one about the Zen of Beards in which I proudly displayed my seven hairs? I still only have seven hairs. Ella is younger than me. She is taller than me. I ask you, is this fair?

To add insult to injury, even Watson has more hair on his chin than I do. Watson is only nine months old, for baaaing out loud! Oh, the humiliation of it all.

So Peanut began to smirk. (I know. He's a cute smirker. Just never you mind that now!)

Ella laughed out loud.

And Boo? A picture is worth a thousand words, grasshopper. (I sure wouldn't be laughing at anyone else if I were that wide!)

You know, Antonio Porchia, in Voces, 1943, wrote, "A thing, until it is everything, is noise, and once it is everything it is silence." As far as I'm concerned, you're all pretty darned noisy. So be silent already! You ain't all that and even one bag of Peanuts, Ella.


goatgirl said...

My goodness Marigold, so you can't grow a proper beard. You have the most gorgeous wattles I have ever seen. In the proper place too. Moly's are under his ears. Who ever heard of that?
Not every goat is blessed with wattles.

Marigold said...

Thank you for your kind words. I suppose they are rather special, aren't they?

farm mama said...

Oh my goodness! Boo is much larger than a bus - she is at least a Mack truck!! How does she get through the barn door?

deconstructingVenus said...

I, too, was struck by your magnificent wattles. Who needs a beard when you have neck adornment like that?!
btw, Boo is just about the strangest looking goat I've ever seen... has she always been that portly?

goatfarmer said...

In an annoying aside that is not about you, Marigold, I must say: That little Peanut! Is he ALWAYS on camera? Reminds me of his mother! CAMERA HOG!

Anyway, back to you: it's true about your wattles, they are perfection. And also, I must tell you, your sister Scouty, who is rapidly becoming almost presentable in her social skills - who could have guessed - is only NOW starting to show signs of a beard, little wispy hints, and she is FOUR YEARS OLD.

Marigold said...

Dear Farm Mama,
Boo is an island unto herself. When Boo decides to go somewhere, everyone else stands aside.

Dear DCV,
Thank you for the compliment (smile). Boo used to be skinny. She blames her 'condition' on hormones. I eat with her, however, and I KNOW.

Dear GoatFarmer,
Hi! Yes, Peanut is ALWAYS trying to get his picture taken by doing obnoxiously cute things. He practices. GO SCOUTY, GO! UPHOLD THE FAMILY HONOR!

Kathryn and Ari said...

Oh, Marigold. I worry quietism might be too much for those dilettantes. Don't be disheartened, though, many of the world's best philosophers have been clean-shaven!

Marigold said...

Dear Kathryn and Ari,
An excellent point. I should have thought of that. Which of you really made this observation? The person or the Caninaturalist?

deconstructingVenus said...

Have you ever notice how much Boo's back end looks like a rhino? Look at her in the background of your picture, Marigold. It's astounding!

Marigold said...

My thoughts exactly, Bwana.