"If providence did beards devise,
To prove the wearers of them wise,
A fulsome goat would then, by nature,
Excel each other human creature." - Thomas D'Urfey

Saturday, August 16, 2008

X,Y and Z-Files

Oh, my goat!!! What is this?! Agent Marigold Scully here, along with my co-Agent, Watson Mulder. At approximately 0800 hours, on the 15th day of August, 2008 (notice it rings of that whole 'Ides' thing again), while investigating known coyote sightings, we came across what you see above. It was huge. It was symmetrical. What could have made it? Are there aliens among us? It had to be investigated further.

Proceeding up the road, we came upon yet another of the bizarre, circular phenomena. To his credit, Watson Mulder approached without fainting. Of course I required that he go first, since I am the one in command. The 'brains' of an operation must remain operational in case plans for further action are required. Nonetheless, neither Watson, nor myself, could find any logical, scientific explanation.

Next we investigated the pasture where a clear-cut, spherical indentation could be seen in the grass. Here, we were assisted by Agent Cabra, tail radar alert and running at full capacity as the abnormality was approached. Yes. It was a 'crop circle' in the truest sense.

The agent stands, perplexed by the marvel at hand.

I, myself, am skeptical that these occurrences can be attributed to an alien origin. Watson Mulder, however, is of a different mind. He sees the incidents as the work of some other-worldly force. Some goat-like creature, greenish in color with white spots and walking on hind legs only. Possibly it possesses several huge horns and a six-foot long beard done in an intricate French-braid. I must admit that it is a possibility. However, if this is indeed the truth, I am sure it is being covered up by some sinister organization in hopes of keeping us ignorant of the truth. The organization is most likely controlled by a diabolical and corrupt Peanut-hoarding cartel. At any rate, I feel further investigation is a necessity. The truth is out there. TRUST NO ONE.

3 comments:

goatfarmer said...

Marigold, I suggest calling an exorcist for the little doglike creature. It does not look like a real dog, it is too cute. Therefore I suspect it may have been body-snatched. In the third photo it appears to be using its 'tail' as an antenna, no doubt to contact the mothership. Also, look for pods around the barn whence future doglike e.t.s may emerge in 'puppy' form. Just a suggestion.

Marigold said...

Ooooo. 'Pod Puppies'. Is that anything like 'Tele-Tubbies'? Will the 'Pod Puppies' have intricately French-braided beards as well? The resident 'Pod Puppy' does have a beard, although it is not braided. Perhaps this is merely the adolescent form?

Kathryn and Ari said...

Ah, Marigold, we have always suspected you were the perfect goat. Now that we know your affinity for the X-files, we are convinced beyond the shadow of a doubt.

PS- Come check out our blog when you get a chance. Goats rule!