"If providence did beards devise,
To prove the wearers of them wise,
A fulsome goat would then, by nature,
Excel each other human creature." - Thomas D'Urfey

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Do You Get SPAM?

I get SPAM.  Oh, the shame.  Do you get SPAM?  Shameful though it may be, I get it because I do not wish to make my lovely readers  jump through hoops trying to copy the dreaded 'Captcha' SPAM-foilers in order to leave a comment.  See what a nice goat I am?

So what kind of SPAM do you get?  I get it from a lot of folks trying to sell shoes.  I admit I haven't been able to figure out why anyone would wish to sell shoes to a goat, but I suppose there must be some mysterious reason to which I am not yet privy.  And then there are the purses.  Louis Vuitton, no less.  Come to think of it, though,  a purse might be nice.  I could carry quite a few Peanuts around in a purse.  And what about those Canadian goose down jackets?  What's up with that?  I already have enough hair to keep me warm for the winter, thank you very much.  But an umbrella would be nice.  Do they make designer umbrellas?  And why are there never offers for Peanuts?  Are there, perhaps, no designer Peanuts out there?

I have to admit, however, that sometimes they don't at least appear to be selling anything.  In fact, sometimes one is unsure as to why they bothered to send the SPAM at all.  And,  lately they seem to be getting more and more inventive.  You just never know what you are going to find.  The ultimate of one such SPAM arrived today regarding my post of yesterday.  I have to tell you,  I laughed so hard I thought I was going to fall off my stump.  Here is what it said:

"Hey! This post could not be written any better! Reading through this post reminds me of my good old room mate! He always kept talking about this. I will forward this page to him."

The whole time I'm thinking, 'Wow.  Your room mate was a goat?!!!  How progressive are you???  A goat that was always talking about whether or not goats came over on the Mayflower?!!!!  What a small world!!! Who knew?'

Oy.

I have but one thing to say to the SPAMMERS of the world:  "The way to gain a good reputation is to endeavor to be what you desire to appear." - Socrates
Now there's a Thanksgiving table full of food for thought. <smile ...>  

20 comments:

Mimi Foxmorton said...

bahahahahahah

How cool is THAT?
I would love to have a GOAT for a room mate! :)

I get a LOT of SPAM.

But I think that a purse full of peanuts is an EXCELLENT idea! ;)

*huggies*

Mimi

H.A. Turbofire, Sibertarian said...

I've been getting a lot of stupid spam lately. Last night I got one for dog collars for HUMANS of all things!

Candy C. said...

I was getting TONS of that kind of Spam too and then I changed my comments to no longer allow Anonymous comments. It stopped immediately!! Check your settings to see if you allow Anonymous. I was allowing them just so my brother could leave comments, now he has to call me! ;)

Marigold said...

Dear MiMi,
I will loan you Ella. As a matter of fact, I will SEND you Ella. Please? Yes, I think a Louis Vuitton brim full of Peanuts is one of my better ideas.

Marigold said...

Dear Turbo,
Ruh Roh. I think you ought to be afraid of that comment. I know I would be. Who do you think sent it? A Collarist? Oy.

Marigold said...

Dear Candy,
An excellent idea. I may have to resort to that. But how does one ever pick up a nice reader who doesn't have an account? On the other hand, I suppose I rarely get 'Anonymous' comments that are legitimate. MORE Thanksgiving food for thought!

Millie said...

I have my account set on the least restrictive, and I get spam according to my e-mail account, but I've only ever had one or two show up on my blog comments the whole time. It just automatically goes into the spam file.

edenhills said...

Marigold, I do think it's silly to send spam to goats. I think Pricilla is the one that mentioned goats being vegetarians have no need for spam. Silly spammers.

Marigold said...

Dear Millie,
Yay! It worked! Thank you so much!!! Happy Thanksgiving. May you get many Peanuts! :)

Marigold said...

Dear Millie,
Good point, that, about goats being vegetarian. Alhthough, come to think of it, I've heard of goats stealing Tuna Fish Sandwiches. Does that count?

staples said...

Although none of us can figure out why a goat would want shoes, it would seem that selling shoes to a goat would be an instant way to double one's sales - four feet really are better than two...

Marigold said...

Dear Staples,
You definitely have a point. I bet Helen told you that.

Mrs. Micawber said...

Yes, we all get SPAM. Though I must give Blogger credit - they do manage to filter out most of it in my case.

Thank you for not making us squint at our screens to try and decipher fuzzy captcha numbers!

P.S. Be careful wishing for designer Peanuts - they'd probably turn out to be genetically modified. ("Exclusively Designed by Monsanto" - or some other evil company seeking world dominion through hybridized seeds.)

Marigold said...

Dear Mrs. Micawber,
Oh,no! I don't want any hybridized Monsanto Peanuts! I'll just hire someone to pick out all the 3-to-a-shellers that naturally occur and fill my Louis Vuitton with those. So if Blogger filters out most of the SPAM for you, does this mean you do not allow 'anonymous' comments?

Kelly said...

I don't get much spam. I think it gets lost in the washer. Huh? I don't like spam. It looks funny in that can. Huh? Sorry, it's the turkey. Took a break from working and having a difficult time focusing. I want a nap. Move over patients. Happy Thanksgiving to all of you guys there on the west coast. Much Love.

Marigold said...

Dear Kelly,
I bet those patients'll share. Did you ask? Your comment brings to mind yet another question for me to ponder on my stump. Why did they name it SPAM? Was it perchance someone who was prejudiced against that stuff in a can? Interesting ... Happy Thanksgiving!

Missy the Goat said...

Well, since goatmom has to have every doo hickey emergency item known to goatdom she wanted me to look up a cat catheter incase a nigerian needed an infusion of mastitis meds. You know what happened... I was tailed for weeks about buying catheters. I can think of worse things though....

Marigold said...

Dear Missy,
Really? by SPAMMERS or the Feds? :) You're right, though. They could have been hawking Hoof Nippers or something equally heinous. :)

Snowcatcher said...

I'm having a difficult time not chuckling after some of the comments, particularly goats not eating Spam! (I personally won't touch the stuff either!)

I get a ton of spam, most of it goes to the spam folder, thank goodness, and I accept anonymous comments because I have several who comment that way. I have to check to make sure they don't go into the spam folder.

One thing I found is that certain words seem to attract spammers, and sadly, spam might be one of them...

I had one post in particular that was getting more than 100 spam comments per day. You should see the hit count on that page! They apparently all stuck it in their bookmarks and just kept coming back again and again and again, several times per hour. They might even have some stupid software that does that for them.

I tried changing the permanent name of the post, and that helped for a while, but they still found it again after a couple of weeks, and then it was back as prolific as ever. So I thought I might switch the post with another, and change the permanent names of both. Again, it stopped for a couple of weeks, but then they came back with a vengeance once again.

So I bit my tongue and held my breath and deleted the post. Ouch, did it ever hurt!!! But spam has dropped off to about two a day now.

I may not be able to make a goat just yet, but I bet I could make a designer purse and fill it with peanuts...

Marigold said...

Dear SnowCatcher,
'That's more words than you spoke since I knowed ya'' Ha! I wouldn't touch SPAM either...unless they figure out how to make it out of Peanuts and then I might give it a try. I think you are right about words catching those SPAMMERS' attention. At any rate, I took Candy's advice and so far so good! Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving! Your new office digs are awesome. :)