"If providence did beards devise,
To prove the wearers of them wise,
A fulsome goat would then, by nature,
Excel each other human creature." - Thomas D'Urfey

Monday, December 24, 2012

The Animals Talked

"Hey, Goatmother.  We're talking at midnight.  Are you going to come out to the barn?"

"No."

"What the hay do you mean, 'No'?  I said we're talking.  T. A. L. K. I. N. G.  Capiche???  Aren't you interested?"

"No."

"Okay.  Well, I guess if you've heard one animal talk, you've heard them all.  And I guess it is kind of  late and all ...  I suppose you'll probably be sleeping really soundly and ... But don't you think you might just skip down to the barn for a few?  It's really not something one experiences every day.  And ... well ... "

<silence + 'The Look'>

"Oy."

18 comments:

Mimi Foxmorton said...

hahahahahaha!

Merry, Merry!

I love you!

*hugs*
~Mimi

Marigold said...

Dear MiMi,
And she didn't come either. I could hear her snoring all the way to the barn. We had to talk LOUD!

Candy C. said...

Silly Goatmother! It would have been worth missing a few minutes of sleep to see what all the animals had to say!! :)

Marigold said...

Dear Candy,
Well, I guess it isn't as though I don't have a lot to say and she hasn't heard it all before anyway. Therein lies the rub, as they say. Oy.

goatsandhounds said...

What will you be talking about? I suppose that if it's a very interesting subject, you might be able to entice her to the barn...

Marigold said...

Dear Goats and Hounds,
Nope. 'Fraid not. Just ain't no gettin' the Goatmother anywhere at midnight. :)

Snowcatcher said...

We tossed the innerds of our Christmas stash over the fence for the (wild) animals to enjoy, and I'm quite certain I hear them talking!

I'd have captured it on film and shared it with the world if I could!

Millie said...

Oh, those humans. You'd think they would be thrilled with the chance to come and chat with us.

Marigold said...

Dear SnowCatcher,
Actually we animals have a good deal to say. Some more than others. :)

Marigold said...

Dear Millie,
For sure. I mean what's a little sleep in exchange for vast knowledge, right?

Ginnie said...

You have to cut Goatmother some slack, Marigold. She's had an eventful year!

Marigold said...

Dear Ginnie,
Ah, I reckon you're right. Well, if I have to ... ")

Missy the Goat said...

The Goatmother just doesn't want to hear it. She knows that she'd have to half sleep walk in the cold rain out there and then all she'd get was, 'where's the peanuts?'.

Marigold said...

Dear Missy,
Oh,now surely we wouldn't be so crass as to only talk about Peanuts. On second thought, maybe you have a point there.

Kelly said...

Cant blame the Goatmother too much. Those blankets are really nice and warm about that hour. Maybe a barn camera with sound for next year so she can hear you.

Marigold said...

Dear Kelly,
You are obviously one great thinking woman! I like this idea!!!

Mrs. Micawber said...

Dear Marigold - I seem to have missed both this post AND your sparkling midnight converse. But I confess that I, too, assumed that Peanuts would be the sole topic.

(Let the Goatmother sleep. She needs it. It's been a rough year.)

Hope your Christmas was merry and flowing with Peanuts! :)

Marigold said...

Dear Mrs. Micawber,
I guess you'll just have to tune in next year if you want to find out what we talk about. We plan to do a podcast. :)