"If providence did beards devise,
To prove the wearers of them wise,
A fulsome goat would then, by nature,
Excel each other human creature." - Thomas D'Urfey

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Hurry Up And Wait

What are you going to do?  The wheels of Medicine don't really move much faster than the wheels of Justice and we all know how slow those are.  So to pass the time, the Universe supplied the Goatmother with a rash in order to occupy her time.  As near as we can tell, it seems to have occurred courtesy of the surgical scrub, which just happens to have been the same thing she was given as a pre-surgery wash and to use after surgery.  Oh, my, such intense itching.  I fully expected to see the Goatmother scraping along the fences like a goat trying to get rid of a winter undercoat.  Thankfully the neighbors were spared and she stayed confined to the house.  Just let me say this:  a rainbow of blessings on the makers of Benadryl.  They may never know what they have done for the world.

But today, the surgeon called with the pathology report.  There was some very good news and some not so good news.  The good news is that the cancer was deemed Stage 1.  It was caught early and there was absolutely no sign of cancer cells in the lymph nodes.  The bad news is that the cancer was neither estrogen nor progesterone receptive.  We aren't exactly sure what that means.  I could have already told them the Goatmother ran out of hormones a long time ago.   But the surgeon did say this indicates  the cancer was very aggressive and thus chemotherapy will likely be required.  Oh, shoot.  We were hoping to avoid that part, but well, it is what it is, as they say.  It's all good, remember?.  Or maybe not, but at least it is doable.  Bald is beautiful, just ask the Goatfather.

I'd like to quote something that our friend, Mrs. Micawber, wrote to the Goatmother.  "In The Return of the King - when Gandalf and Pippin are standing on the balcony at Minas Tirith, looking across at the dark mountains and the smoky sky of Mordor, talking of the battle ahead. Gandalf says, "This is the deep breath before the plunge." (And Pippin replies, "I don’t want to be in a battle.  But waiting on the edge of one I can’t escape is even worse.")  None of us who haven't been through it can imagine what you're feeling right now, but we're standing on the balcony, taking the deep breath with you. Hang in there, and know that the thoughts and prayers of your friends go with you into the fight."  How beautiful is that?  (In fact, I couldn't have said it better myself - or maybe I could, but I didn't think of it.)

The fact of the matter is that once you receive that diagnosis; once your ears hear those words, it is with you forever.  Your life changes in an instant and you know that even though you make it through the initial battle, the threat of war is ever present from then on.  Not a pleasant thought, that, but luckily human beings are pretty resilient.  (Goats are better, but that's probably just because we have more legs and better eyesight.  Plus there is that ever-present lure of the Peanut ...)  And isn't the Goatmother lucky to have such wonderful friends?

Frodo: "I know what I must do, it's just that... I'm afraid to do it."
Galadriel
: "Even the smallest person can change the course of the future." 

24 comments:

Candy C. said...

I'm sorry about the Goatmother's itchy rash but so very glad she didn't resort to rubbing along the fence like the goaties do!
We are all behind you in this war, fight on!!

Millie said...

So good to hear you caught this monster early. Much better than waiting until a raccoon has eaten all the chickens. We, too, are standing here taking that breath with you.

Marigold said...

Dear Candy,
Thank you for the back up. You don't have any Nubians do you? You can ask Ozarks Goat Girl...they take extra training. I'm just sayin'...

Marigold said...

Dear Millie,
Thank you for the extra breath! Those pesky raccoons would take the Peanuts, too, if given half a chance.

Mrs. Micawber said...

Good ol' Benadryl.

I'm so glad to hear they caught the cancer early. As Smeagol said to Gollum, let us say to this disease: "Leave now, and never come back!"

On to the next stage of the quest. "We must take a hard road, a road unforeseen. There lies our hope...." (Elrond, The Fellowship of the Ring - book, not movie)

P.S. What are the Goatmother's favourite colours? (Just in case someone wants to make her a hat.)

Marigold said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Marigold said...

Sorry, I just HAD to correct my typo! :) Now then,
Dear Mrs. Micawber, Yes, good ole' Benadryl indeed! A life saver for sure. You are, of course, too sweet! We are very glad to have you along on this journey along with so many other very special people. If what goes around truly comes around, you are in for a most auspicious future. :)

Snowcatcher said...

Well, the bad part wasn't what I wanted to hear or what I hoped for and prayed for, but I too am thankful they caught it early and that the army is amassing to stand beside the Goatmother and rallying in her support.

Still, I would have loved to seen a video of anyone from your farm, two-legged or four, scraping up against the fence. I can't help myself. I'd be out there collecting fiber tidbits to spin and dye!!!

Marigold said...

Dear Snowcatcher,
Yes, we just have to keep reminding the Goatmother, 'I CAN!'
I don't think you would have enjoyed seeing the Goatmother scraping along the fence. Really, I think a Goat would be much more enjoyable. However, we didn't know you were a spinner too! The Goatmother has been gathering our cashmere for a couple of years, She might actually have it processed some day.

Terry said...

Well, the Goatmother is going to lose hair without scratching across a fence. But, then, she will grow it back. A friend of mine lost her hair to chemo and it came back in much nicer than before AND she used it as an excuse to get a very good hairstyle, much better than before. So, the Goatmother will become sleek and chic. You goaties watch out.

Marigold said...

Dear Terry,
Woo Hoo! Something to look forward to at last!

Julie said...

Just checking in to see what Marigold is going through. I didn't get a chance to see the Goat Mother and Father on Wednesday for breakfast this week as I was out of town! I've been thinking about the goat mother and father and Paul and I send all the best! Julie

denise f said...

Where do I post the picture of my silver mohawk when MY hair started growing back? Stage 1 is AWESOME!!! Yippee!! That means the goatmother indeed has captured the intruder quite early. Mine was 2B, so this joyous news indeed! Peanuts for all!!

staples said...

We are all so pleased to hear about the good news!

Marigold said...

Dear Staples,
You and me both! Still a daunting road, but so very much better than so many, many women hear. We are indeed blessed. Thank you for traveling with us! (Gee, that sounded like an airline commercial) Oy.

Marigold said...

Dear Denise,
I don't know, but I want to see that picture. That has to be better than the long hair that stands up on Watson's back when he sees Ella. Peanuts for all is correct (as long as I get extras. I'm just sayin'...)Thank you for sharing your 'expertise' with us on this aruduous journey!

Marigold said...

Dear Julie,
Hey! So glad to see you here!!!! You actually didn't miss the Goatmother and Goatfather as they didn't make it this week. So, it's all good. Next week, however, is a new week. :) It will be full of new adventures, but, hay, people have to eat to keep up their strength, right? :) Stay tuned and thanks for checking up on us!!!!

Kelly said...

Our thoughts and prayers are with you! Chin up. Deep breath. Side by side. Feel our love. Isabella said, "she has to know us Nubians are smart". Then she walked off and scratched her back along the fence just to let you know she was listening. ;)

Marigold said...

Dear Kelly,
The fact of the matter is that, since I am half Nubian, I do know that Nubians are smart. Fortunately, however, I didn't get as much of the 'dense' Nubian gene. Yes, Nubians are smart, it is just that gene gets in the way and it often takes rather a long time to get to the 'smart' part. :) We are most assuredly feeling the love, and we are more grateful for that than you can imagine.

Queen Quattra said...

Oh, we were hoping no chemo BUTT, it is just one more weapon in the BTHOOC campaign...just a little added insurance...so to speak!! Kinda like extra peanuts...kinda! Like the starfish clinging to a rock...Hang in There!! (I saw that somewhere) :}
Sending more goatie and human healing vibes your way!!

Marigold said...

Dear Queen Quattra,
We be a clingin' to that rock with all 6 legs. Oh, wait, I only have 4, but the Goatmother has 2, so that makes 6 so it's all good! Thank you for being in the 'drink' with us! However, nothing is like extra Peanuts. I just thought I'd point that out. :)

Mimi Foxmorton said...

Hi Honey-

This is the most beautiful and inspiring blog I've ever read.

Gods....but you are such a beautiful soul.......

(Though I laughed out loud at the mental image of the fence scrape.....) :)

The Sisterhood is behind you!
(Just not if you're scraping naked on the fence.....for that we'll stand to the side.....)

much love!
xo
~Mimi

Marigold said...

Dear MiMi,
All Hail to the Sisterhood! And, I know ... that mental picture is quite disturbing. I'd step aside too. :)

Buffybelle said...

Tis the season for the C word. On the same day a week ago the Goatmom found out her Bro and also a girlfriend have C. The Bro a Melanoma and the Gf has an agressive breast cancer also, a stage 2. But she was told that the agressive kind is more agressive at absorbing the chemo which is a good thing. The Bro had a PET Scan friday and results will be Monday and the friend has to have one also and will go on chemo to shrink it before surgery. I wanted to stick with slaying Chupacabras since they are so much less formidable but I may have to reconsider now.