"If providence did beards devise,
To prove the wearers of them wise,
A fulsome goat would then, by nature,
Excel each other human creature." - Thomas D'Urfey

Saturday, May 5, 2012

First You Cry

Good morning all.  I am sure you have all been wondering just exactly why I have been so silent.  Certainly it is very uncharacteristic, to say the least.  But the truth of the matter is, there has been a rather large monkey wrench (darn those monkeys anyway) thrown into the cogs on the wheel of life around here.  So bear with me while I figure out how to go about this.

First of all, I would have written earlier, but I couldn't remember where it was you went to actually start a new post. (Thank you, Blogger).  So after I figured out that I didn't want to do it in Arabic or Czech, I finally figured out, 'Oh!  It is this stupid looking orange pencil thingy!'.

Now, then, to the matter at hand.  This blog is going to take a bit of a new direction, and there is a reason for this.  Let me just say, right now, that if you are put off by this change (see my previous rules), and choose to stop reading, well, then so be it.  We will miss you, but I am hoping that won't be the case. 

So let me get right to the point.  Our beloved Goatmother has been diagnosed with breast cancer.  Yes, it is that awful 'C' word.  At first no one could even utter the word.  We found lots of other ways to say it like, 'Oh.  The biopsy came back positive', or 'Oh.  The doctor found something not so good.', or 'Oy Vay!, Mama!  What are these people really trying to say?'  And the title of this post is unequivocally true.  First you cry.  And then the fear takes hold.  Mr. Fear is a terrible task master and the jerk tends to lead one off into quite unacceptable territory.  Unreasonable thoughts begin to enter one's mind.  Things like, 'Where in the hay are my Peanuts going to come from?' Oh, wait.  Maybe that was a bad example ...

Anyway, for the sake of the Goatmother, I am going to be blogging through this ordeal.  The posts may not be regular, but then again, who knows?  However, they will keep coming.  We're absolutely not going anywhere!  I figure it will help the Goatmother immensely to have someone willing to help her vent her feelings, keep up her spirits, and most importantly, to boost her sense of humor.  We are firm believers around here that a sense of humor is paramount to keeping a positive attitude.  Laughter IS the best medicine.

And so far we are all completely blown away by the kindness, graciousness and beauty in people.  People willing to help in any way they can.  People willing to just send encouragement.  So much coming from so many unexpected places.  (Ella has even promised to act like less of a punk.  Mind you she is likely to fall off the wagon a time or two, but I suppose it is the thought that counts.)  We will never be able to repay them all, but we will try.  Oh, yes, we will try.

Above all, I am here, along with so many others, to help the Goatmother BUTT THE HAY out of this monster.  With five hard and angry goat heads, one very determined fireball of a Goatfather, two dogs willing to bite this thing in its sorry (pardon my goat) ass, and a whole passel of the most wonderful beings walking the face of this beautiful planet, that is exactly what we are going to do.  We have received an offer from The Snowcatcher to use her bicycling-forged thunder thighs to kick butt, an offer from a herd of misguided pygmy goats over at 'Ewww!  What's On My Shoe', (who have first hand knowledge of this monster themselves), and oh, so many other capable assassin types.  We may even enlist Darla, the world's best dressed goat over at The Goat Borrower, to design a lovely canceresque goat cap.  Hay, it could happen!  And I can't leave out the fabulous Goatfarmer and all my friends over at my birthplace, This Goat's Life, CoraBelle and her minions at Life Beyond the Sidewalks, the goat boys and other critters at On the Way to Critter Farm (who just went through something similar themselves), Millie and everyone at Eden Hills, and I am sure I have forgotten someone.  (And these are just the bloggers ... there are so many more.  As I said we will never be able to repay them all.)    But if I forgot, please forgive.  The brain is rather mush right now. ( I think it may be because we had to endure the Goatfather trimming our hooves.  Trust me, it was as much a chose nouvelle for him as it was for us.  But more likely the brain mush is due to a lack of Peanuts.  I'm just sayin'....  One has to keep up one's strength in the face of adversity.)

So, my friends,  Beam me up, Scotty, and fasten your seat belts, 'cuz we're goin' for a ride!

P.S.  The Goatmother asked her surgeon how she felt about being on the internet.  Her reply?  "Well, there's a woman whose duck has a blog and I'm on it.  Why not a goat?"  Needless to say, we have a lot of faith in this woman.


65 comments:

Millie said...

I must say, I'm very encouraged to hear that your doctor is okay with ducks and goats blogging. How could you go wrong. We will all certainly stand behind you and butt away at that cancer! Blessings and healing energy from all of us at Eden Hills.

Terry said...

I have a friend who was diagnosed with a very rare cancer. Not a chance in heck that she'd survive. She went through chemo, radiation AND a bone marrow transplant. For two years she paid to board her horse. She couldn't even visit the barn. But that horse was there reminding her that she had a life with animals up ahead. And she does! She's back to riding, and knock on wood, she's C free. Now, if that one horse could motivate and keep my friend going, then a barn full of goats can do the same for you (they would say, even more, head butts being way more effective than tail swishes.) My two goats add their joy of life to the mix. That's some powerful juju you've got behind you.

Marigold said...

Dear Millie,
You have already given us one of the greatest blessings, the gift of friendship. Thank you from the bottom of my goatie heart.

Dear Terry,
Please tell your friend that she will stand as a model for us. Although I have to admit that I do think head butts are far more effective at delivering the proper message than a tail swish. :) Thank you for your wonderful comment!

IsobelleGoLightly said...

We all here are sending good goatie wishes, sheep kisses and horse slobbers (well, they do) to you! I suppose the chickens would send pecks but that might not be the right thing....I know...the chickens will send songs for you. They often sing little murmuring songs to themselves so I'll ask them to send them to you to cheer you.

Marigold said...

Dear Isobelle,
Actually, we have something to thank you for. When your lady lost weight recently, it inspired the Goatmother to do the same. Had it not been for her losing weight, she doesn't believe she would have noticed the lump. So thank you, even though you didn't even know you did anything. Do chickens slobber?

Claire the Shepherdess said...

The goatmother is an incredibly upbeat and positive person...I feel sure that this will just be a tiny blip in the radar. Apart from this, she also has that magical pointy hat, which should be worn regularly through this ordeal. I also know that all of you goats will certainly be a critical part of the overall wellness strategy. I do have some experience with relying on the hugging of goats for strength, even through vast quantities of tears. Fezzik and Lucky Nickel shall be in charge of sending positive goat vibes from Canada. We shall all be thinking of you. xo

HR Human said...

I'm sorry that your Goatmother is going through this. But she is not alone as we are all with her.

And, if you think it will help, I'll introduce legislation in Congress to ban cancer.

Sibe vibes & licks!

Turbo the Sibe said...

(Blogger is being stupid and I can't log in under my profile.)

I'm sorry that your Goatmother is going through this. But she is not alone as we are all with her.

And, if you think it will help, I'll introduce legislation in Congress to ban cancer.

Sibe vibes & licks!

Marigold said...

Dear Turbo and HR,
See you got two comments through! I agree. Blogger is STUPID! In fact, I went back to the old dashboard and they'll have to pry me off. Can't take anymore frustration right now! Thank you for being with us, and yes, please DO introduce some legislation. Plus, who knows, it might give the politicians something unSTUPID to fight about.

Marigold said...

Dear Claire,
Don't think we had any question that you'd be with us. And let me tell you, we appreciate it! We know you've been going through some tough stuff too. So, from Nova Scotia to Washington, there is gonna' be a whole lot of buttin' goin' on in between! Thank you for being with us, as we are with you. We are incredibly humbled.

staples said...

Helen, Albie, Roger and his flock will all be butting away the cancer for the Goatmother, Marigold.

Marigold said...

Dear Staples,
We are humbled by this so very appreciated offer from clear across the world. If we can get it butted down there towards your end, can you help it on over the edge? Or maybe we can send it spinning out of control in a Tie Fighter like Darth Vader. Yeah. That's good.

Danni said...

Talking about it *does* help. Opening up and reaching out to people can be hard, but the support I have found within this blogging community of ours has been tremendous. I'm thinking of you and sending you lots of good thoughts and Pete and Reggie are sending many, many pushy, head-butting goat hugs.

Goat Girls Rule! said...

11 goat heads -- at your service -- ready for butting any time you need them.

Mimi Foxmorton said...

Ah, my luv.......and even with this you make us smile......... :)

Please know that when Goat Sisters are involved you will never be alone!

I can't tell you how much I enjoy blogging with you and hearing your stories. I can't see a peanut without thinking of Marigold! :)

I am MOST certain that Darla and I can manage a most MAGICAL topper for your pate! In fact, I'm SURE of it! :)

'Tis a dusty road you'll have to walk these next months but your Spirit and the Sisterhood will be your support.

I am very glad that you will continue to blog throughout. Not only do we want to know every detail of your recovery but blogging, I've found, is also good for the soul! :) Write! Write! Write! (Because we HAVE to!)

I'm glad to hear you have such faith in your healer. That is always a most excellent first step. It makes a world of difference.

We're here.......whatever you need.......

And by the by....I think BUTT THE HAY OUT OF CANCER is a most EXCELLENT logo for this journey! Who better than a loving goat to be your muse! :)

All our Blessings and healing energy........

love,
Mimi and Darla
xo

Kelly said...

Damnit! Now that said, you know you are going to be in our thoughts and prayers for the long haul. Goat kisses and goatielove will get you through and bring you smiles. We gots lots and lots of goatielove for ya sistah.

Mrs. Micawber said...

Dear Marigold (and dearest Goatmother),

My prayers are with you all. Sign me up for the BTHOOC fellowship, and keep on keeping us posted (if you can find the right #$&% button to click, that is).

Loving wishes from your friend Sue, daughter of a breast cancer survivor

Marigold said...

Dear Kelly,
Thank you! We don't know what to say. How can we be so blessed? Even Ella is humbled, and Boy!, that NEVER happens.

Marigold said...

Dear Mrs. Micawber,
We might need a few hat crochet patterns. :) Thank you for your kindness. Thank you for your friendship (not to mention your fabulous muse abilities) Again, we are humbled. This might not be as good as one of your lovely bicycle rides, but we will be most honored to have you along.

Marigold said...

Dear Goat Girls Rule,
Eleven more heads! We are honored! We ought to be able to BTHOOC magnificently, don't you think? Thank you! Again, and again we are blessed and honored by the expressions of such beautiful people (and goats).

Marigold said...

Dear Danni,
There are not words to say how much this wonderful blogging community means. You are quite right about that. Thank you for your thoughts and support and please thank Pete and Reggie. If they have as many active butts in them as Peanut, we are bound to achieve our goal. P.S. Could we have a few donkey kicks too?

Melodie said...

You and count me in on the support and all my goaties too.We will be sending many prayers and good goatie thought your way.I will talk to Butter Bean,he is mean.He will T-bone a dog twice his size and not even think twice.He could send some powerful mean thoughts to the C. Hang in there,you are going to get through this!

"Auntie" sezzzzzz... said...

Oh my Dear!!! Have been wondering where you got to. And sigh, now I know it wasn't just to do some fun new project, like learning a new camera. -sigh-

Best of luck. I'm not a praying person but you know that. But many good thoughts and wishes, to you.

And many, many gentle hugs,
"Auntie"

"Auntie" sezzzzzz... said...

Just read TERRY'S comment, the 2nd one in the queue. "If one horse could.." Wonderful comment, Terry!

Gentle hugs,
"Auntie"

Michelle | Goat Berries said...

Many hugs and goat kisses to you and your Goatmother from southern Italy xx

DebH said...

Your not alone at all in this! 2003 scared the bejeebas out of me too. Reading your feelings brought back everything. Every single day was different, but when you have a buddy along the way...it helps tremendously. You have many out here in blogland and it'll work wonders. My very best to your Goatmother and p.s.
I swear the chemo nurse who I got to know for a year, was doing a trance like hypnotizing on me, because when I woke up some 12 months later...I LOVED all Goats. I didn't look back and I take the world on like I'm in charge. Look out world!!

Marigold said...

Dear Melodie,
THANK YOU for your offer of Butter Bean. But, really, don't you think he ought to have a tougher name? Something like, Oh, I dunno'...Thor? :) The Goatmother woke up this morning and saw even more responses from people like you and she's been in tears ever since. Blessings to you! (And be sure to be giving Butter Bean some spinach...just sayin'...)

Marigold said...

Dearest Auntie,
We had no doubt that you would be among our supporters. Gentle hugs are most gratefully acknowledged and taken. More tears. Oh, my, I am not sure the waterworks will ever stop. Blessings to you and many thanks for being there.

Marigold said...

Dear Michelle,
Oh, my. Wishes from Italy? The Goatmother is beyond words. (I can tell you that this is not a normal state for the Goatmother) Blessings to you from the bottom of our hearts.THANK YOU!

Marigold said...

Dear DebH,
More tears. (I'm going to have to get the Goatmother a towel.) You shall serve as inspiration to us as well. I will do my utmost to keep the kind of attitude you have butted into the Goatmother's head. But seriously, didn't you love ALL goats before? I mean, what's not to love?
Blessings to you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Queen Quattra said...

Dear Millie,
Please tell your Goatmother that she has already won more than half of the battle, with her extraordinary sense of humor and spirit!! You can count us in the BTHOOC club to help fight the other, smaller, half of the battle! And speaking of tears..this is a little poem...ok, it doesn't rhyme but it's something our Goatmother read alot when she had breast cancer to help her through some of those yucky days and we're hoping it might bring a lil comfort to your Goatmother!
There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than 10,000 tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition and of unspeakable love.
Sending much goatie (and human) healing energy, your way!!

Snowcatcher said...

That's the spirit!!! I knew once the Goatmother let you in on her little secret, you'd help her butt the crap out of the C word. I knew we could count on you!

I'm so thrilled with this community of support and for everyone coming out of the woodwork to help brace up the Goatmother. We will indeed get her through this.

Marigold said...

Dear SnowCatcher,
No words again. The Goatmother may be speechless by the time this is all over. She thinks she doesn't deserve all this love, but we'll giver her a Peanut. That'll shut her up for a bit. Thank you a million times over. Blessings to you and the Lizard who has a name.

Marigold said...

Dear Queen Quattra,
Oh. Just Oh. We don't know what to say, but our heart goes out to you that you had to face this monster too. But you got through it! Thank you a million times over for sharing that with the Goatmother. And your poem is going to get printed on a big piece of paper to go up where she can see it every single day. Blessings to you and to Smidgen, the cute.

Patty Woodland said...

Well Marigold if there is anyone who can butt the hell out of things that is Abbygoat and if you want to borrow her for the Goatmother you may. Just let us know and as soon as little Flash is big enough we'll send her along.
We send goat hugs to all of you and especially to the Goatmother.
Pricilla

Faith said...

Marigold, the goat mother is clearly a little nuts herself to think she doesn't deserve all this love....I know you'll set her straight....I am a pray-er it's the only way I know....I'll be praying.x

Zitrone said...

Marigold dear,
I am sad to say that I don't have any goats, but Critter Farm Girl has Pete and Reggie, and I have become close friends with them. So I know a little about goat psychology. Having said that, I know that you are upset and worried about your goatmom having cancer. So let me tell you a little story.

Last December, I had to tell my dog, Wolfi, that I had somehow caught a very rare cancer. Wolfi's eyes filled with tears, and he asked me all kinds of questions that I couldn't answer. I promised him, however, to get all the information available, to be in touch with the oncologist and his staff almost daily and surround myself with a huge support group. All that seemed to calm him down, and he trusted me and my proactive attitude.

So now, six chemo treatments later, I am beautifully bald and in remission. Throughout these months of treatment, Critter Farm Girl went with me to all infusions and called me every night at 7:30 sharp. Well, almost anyway. I do miss her calls; now that the treatment has been successful, she doesn't call as often. She is probably playing with Pete and Reggie.

Marigold, if you ever want to talk about cancer, fear of the unknown or how to face each day, let me know, and I'll call your goatmom since you don't have a phone.

Meanwhile, tell your goatmom to trust that everything is going to be fine. The donkey boys, Beau and Chester, and Kai Llama are convinced of it, too.

Queen Quattra said...

Oh, that's so sweet that you remembered my daughter, Smidgen...well after all, she and Peanut did have the big, cutest baby goat, contest!! I never did tell Smidgen she didn't win but oh well...what they don't know, won't hurt them! :) BTW Millie, if you would like to give your Goatmother my Goatmother's e-mail address..it is christinalfrutiger@comcast.net..you know, just in case she might want a little cheering section from a human point of view and from one thats been there, done that!! She always liked hearing from other ladies that had been there, done that...it was a comfort, cause that dang cancer thing is very scary!
Our good thoughts are with your Goatmother! :)

Marigold said...

Dearest Zitrone,
I know that you are one of the bravest people we know. These words,coming from you,mean more than we can possibly say. Thank you for your kindness and your offer. You gotta' be one heck of a lady, since Danni is such an outstanding person. Thank you, thank you both. We keep finding ourselves speechless and without adequate expression. So thank you from our hearts will have to do for now. Blessings to you and healing thoughts for all the days to come.

Marigold said...

Dear Faith,
Knowing that you are there and you care is enough. Knowing that you are praying is more. Thank you. Humbly, just thank you.

Queen Quattra said...

Dear Marigold...you must forgive me for calling you Millie (twice)...I was so flustered about hearing about your Goatmother that I just wasn't thinking straight...and that is sooo unlike me!! For crying out loud...Millie...we all know who she is and she lives at a completely different farm..you know, the one we both came from...how ditzy of me, is that??

Marigold said...

Dear Pricilla and Patty,
Oh, my. Such a gracious offer. :) Thank you. Although, somehow I think Abby and Ella might end up at odds. Maybe two peas in a pod?:) But honestly, we just don't know how to thank you and everyone. Just knowing that there are such beautiful souls out there is beyond amazing. I wish I had a better vocabulary, but even that might not be enough. Thank you and blessings to you all.

Marigold said...

Dear Queen Quattra,
Thank you! Email duly noted and the offer is, again, ... sorry, I just don't have the words. It is appreciated beyond words. As for 'Millie', we also have Millie the beautiful Saanen at Eden Hills, but we didn't even notice the 'mistake'. It's all good. As for Smidgen, just tell her Peanut cheated. He's like that. It has something to do with being Hannah Belle's son. :)

goatgirl said...

I am glad Marigold will be there to keep us updated:)
There was a lot of Butting the Hay out of Cancer at Minter Bay Dairy Goats today. We can do this!!!

Blogger is stupid...I'm still fighting off any change though.

Marigold said...

Dear GoatGirl,
CoraBelle is a Grand Champion and so she should be able to do some awesomely regal butting. I think the Tiny Giant ought to do a fair job as well. We thank you for any butting done and we thank you for being the wonderful person you are.
Blessings to everyone at Minter Bay Dairy Goats!

Ozarks Goat Girl said...

Dear Marigold,
I am glad to hear from you again, have been missing your comments, but shocked to hear why the absence has been. Please tell your Goatmother that strength and well wishes are being sent from the Missouri Ozarks to her and that 5 more goats (sorry, 3 of them are nubians) are butting the hay out of cancer on her behalf!

goatfarmer said...

Several teams of Buttinskys available if needed. Buttoutskys as well.

Marigold said...

Dear, Dear GoatFarmer,
What would we do without you? You make me laugh, and laughter is oh, so healing and oh, so much needed. There are no words (Again. Sigh...)Buttinskys and Buttoutskys all welcome. And if you know of any way to commune with Hannah Belle we'd take that to. There's likely no one better to figure out how to get out of this (Peanut sadly didn't inherit the escape gene, but he did get a double dose of the butt-anything-in-sight gene, so that will have to suffice I suppose.) A rainbow of Blessings to you and all of Herron Hill (even the truck).

Marigold said...

Dear Ozarks Goat Girl,
Thank you so much! The Ozarks are so beautiful (The Goatmother has family in Bentonville) there is bound to be some awesome energy in them thar' hills. I have to say it is getting to be quite de rigeur to get up, open up the email and cry. Blessings to all in the Ozarks. However, it might pay to keep an eye on the Nubians and redirect them every once in awhile. That is a lot of concentration for a Nubianesque mind to handle. I'm just sayin' ...

Ozarks Goat Girl said...

Marigold, I have to admit that you and sometimes the GoatFarmer at Herron Hill use words that are out of my league. Remember that I am a simple hillbilly and words like de rigeur go right over my head and way over my Nubians heads and then we have to just make up what we think is being said and usually it is wrong and that is why we get in trouble all the time. We like short words best.

Marigold said...

Dear Ozarks Goat Girl and Nubians,
What can I say? I am who I am. Guessing is good. It can be really entertaining. :)

Buffybelle said...

My Goatmom's mom, The Great Goatmom (and she's still great by the way), had breast cancer 15 years ago, a bad kind. With lumpectomy and rads it got butted out. So butting can work. All eight of us, also, are sending healing butts your way.

Marigold said...

Dear BuffyBelle,
Okay! This is what we like to hear! The people that are years down the road and still cookin'! Now, then, since you are the slayer, and there can be only one, do you think you could throw in some slaying along with that butting???

denise f said...

Marigold and Goatmother!! Hooray, you're back! You've been gone too long! Laughter is, indeed, the best kind of medicine (but still listen to your surgeon, even though she is barely our of grade school). And remember that we are here for you, whenever you need some cheering up. If the goats are busy, I'll send SamDammit. He will BITE the HAY out of C!! xoxoxo

Marigold said...

Dear Denise,
Smile. Thank you beyond words! You understand what I'm saying. Even though SamDammit is a dog, he is quite welcome. And what was the girl B.C.'s name? Does she have sharp teeth? :) How 'bout all those misguided pygmy pool babes?

Ginnie said...

Oh, Marigold! Please tell Goatmother that she is in my prayers, along with all the rest of you. With all those hard heads butting, she is in very good hands.

Marigold said...

Dear Ginnie,
We thank you more than you can imagine. Prayers, positivity, you name it. We aren't proud, we'll take all we can get (even Peanuts. I'm just sayin'...).

Buttons said...

Oh I hope all things are going well. I know what does that mean with Cancer? I guess the good days and laughter are what is needed so I do hope she is having a good day and may there be lots of laughter. My prayers are with her and everyone else trying to butt this darn thing.
I am getting very tired of hearing the words Cancer it is so hard to keep laughing but we must. HUGS B

Marigold said...

Dear Buttons,
Yes, laughter is definitely on the menu and well served. Thank you for coming along on this ride!! We need all the help we can get.

Dirt Lover said...

I stumbled upon this post from... somewhere~I don't remember. What great support you have. So much love, and so many people (and goats) that think you are wonderful. Just thought I'd send out my positive vibes, along with everybody else. I'm a survivor of thyroid cancer, almost 4 years now. My amazing sister in law a survivor of a particular nasty type of breast cancer, 11 years, and my other sister in law a 15 year survivor of breast cancer. My husband is currently fighting the beast for a little over a year now. Boy, he is a fighter.
So, you go, girl! You are in the midst of lots of love, and lots of people that know where you're coming from. Keep on fighting and keep on lovin'. Please know that many people love you and wish you only the best, and lots and lots of good health. Be strong, and keep on keeping on.
~~Lori

Marigold said...

Dear Dirt Lover,
Thank you for stopping by and for commenting! It means so very much to hear of survivors!!! Thank you so much. People are truly, truly awesome!

Zitrone said...

Hey Marigold,
tell your goatmother that I'm in Germany having the time of my life. Literally.
More later. Too excited about showing my granddaughter (10) Weimar today - town of music, poetry, history.....

Marigold said...

Hey, Zitrone!
So good to hear you are having the greatest time!!!!! You go! And bring back LOTS of pictures! Do you miss Umpqua Ice Cream??? :)

Zitrone said...

Recovering from the big "C" is an adventure! Each day is richer than the previous one, and it doesn't matter if some of it is crummy. That's just life, and I highly recommend that the goatmother partake with optimism, courage and energy. And being a little on the wild side isn't bad either.....

Marigold said...

Dear Zitrone,
Let's hear it for the wild side!!! :)