"If providence did beards devise,
To prove the wearers of them wise,
A fulsome goat would then, by nature,
Excel each other human creature." - Thomas D'Urfey

Sunday, June 17, 2012

More Things We've Learned So Far

This situation is nothing if not a learning experience.  Trouble is, it doesn't seem to always be things we really dance with anticipation to learn.  Still, I suppose it is what it is and at least it has one redeeming quality ... it isn't as bad as reality TV.  Now there is a scary thought,

So, let's see now.  What exactly further have we learned?

No. 1 - People are STILL friggin' amazing!  Okay, now this is saying a lot because we didn't think people could be anymore amazing than they were when this whole thing began.  But you know what?  They are!  And they continue to be!  Now you would think that after the 'new' wore off, so to speak, people would go on with their lives, having expressed their caring and feeling really bad for the Goatmother, but then going on about their daily business.  But that hasn't happened.  No indeed!  Those beautiful souls that pledged to travel along on this journey with the Goatmother have amazingly continued  to travel along, holding her up even when she was way down under that stupid big Disco ball.  They have laughed with her, cried with her and generally kept her afloat.  Who could have ever imagined that this would be the case?  If you didn't think so, then 'Oh, ye of little faith!' because they have most assuredly been there through the thick and the thin of things.  A goat couldn't have done better, and that is saying something coming from me.  B.R.A.V.O.!!!!, my friends.  You are the light of the world.  There are so many who like to 'talk the talk' but do not 'walk the walk'.  That is not you and each of you is valued, cherished and loved beyond measure.  And should anyone ever dare to intimate that you are 'less than', then you send them to me and I will set them on the straight and narrow path to enlightenment.  (Cancer isn't the only thing I can butt the hay out of!)

No. 2 - Those presentable underwear continue to be of utmost importance, as are at least one presentable pair of pants that don't have 'barn' stains.  Okay, this kind of goes without saying, doesn't it?  I suppose I have to say that modesty kind of flies out the barn door too.  You always hear, 'seen one, seen 'em all', and, well, that's really the truth of it.  If you are overly modest, get over yourself.  What if you had an udder that had to get milked all the time?  See?  Goats know these things.  Of course this does not mean that one should seek to emulate Lady Godiva (the woman or the chocolate), but there is a time and place for everything and all things in good time.  So plan.  That is what goats do.  Think ahead.  If goats did not do this, Alpines would get all the Peanuts in the world and amass corporations like Proctor and Gamble or Nestle.  And just so you know, those undies don't have to be Givenchy.  Fruit of the Loom works just fine.   Just no holes, okay?  And no goat slobber stains.  I'm just sayin' ...

No. 3 - Bone pain is not our friend.  We were kind of hoping we weren't actually going to find out about this one.  But the Goatmother has always been a late bloomer.  What can I say?  I suppose, on the upside, at least she still knows she has bones and they have not turned to rubber.  That, at least, is encouraging.  Methinks that all those 'tall' girls in junior high probably experienced this kind of thing, but since the Goatmother could never have been, by any stretch of the imagination, called 'tall', she didn't 'get' to experience it back then and gets to now.  Life has a way of filling in the gaps like that.  Never allow yourself to think you actually 'got away' with something.  Goats know this too.  Which is why if you actually make it through a day without being T-boned, you always just count yourself lucky and add it to the 'this-is-gonna'-come-around-and-slap-me-in-the-butt-soon' stack you've been accumulating.  Believe it.  It will happen.  Life is an equal-opportunity employer.

No. 4 - Chickens and the Irish have a lot in common - in some respects anyway.  No doubt you are wondering about this one.  Let me just say this.  When your tastes change, and you feel like you've been stomped by 100 Alpines and sat on by 39 over-weight Nubians, there is one thing that helps.  Well, really, two, I guess.  Chicken soup and potatoes.  Now being a goat, I would much prefer Peanuts, or even some choice Kale, but the Goatmother assures me of the validity of this statement.  Chicken soup, baked chicken, chicken stew .... chicken, chicken, chicken.  In fact, when she was telling me this I was beginning to feel a little like Forrest Gump ..."You can barbecue it, boil it, broil it, bake it, saute it. Dey's uh, chicken-kabobs, chicken creole, chicken gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried ..."  Oy.  And that doesn't begin to cover the potatoes ... boiled, baked, mashed, sauteed ...  Now, see, the Irish knew all about this potato thing and that is why they raised them and had to leave when they had the great potato famine.  I find myself wondering if perhaps there was a great mass of Goatmothers on chemotherapy in the country at this time.  The Goatmother does have some Irish ancestry.  At any rate, God bless the humble chicken and the lowly potato.  They do a body good.  ( I have to let you know that I am taking bets as to how long the Goatfather is going to hold up under this onslaught.  Two to one odds.  I'm just sayin' ... -  just in case you are interested.)

No. 5 - The most valuable of human senses is a sense of humor!  Well, duh.  We knew this one already, but NEVER has it been more evident than now.  Hope may spring eternal, but a sense of humor is what gives us the wherewithal to to even begin to hope.  We are far too serious creatures anyway (just ask any Alpine), and seriousness may get you respect (and it may not), but that sense of humor will get you through anything.  It will stand beside you when every other of your sensibilities has gone by the wayside.  For whatever reason, the human mind looks at 'seriousness' and sees 'knowledge' and 'maturity'.  Those 'serious' people are smart. by Goat!  But in truth, the 'serious' are really the scared, and how anyone can think to equate 'fear' with 'maturity' is beyond my comprehension.  At any rate, as one of those sayings making its rounds across the Internet purports, 'Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light'.  And light is definitely where it's at.  Besides, it helps you to see what you're eating.  Which might likely be chicken. 

"Frodo: I can't do this, Sam.
: I know. It's all wrong. By rights we shouldn't even be here. But we are. It's like in the great stories, Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger, they were. And sometimes you didn't want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it's only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, Mr. Frodo, I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn't. They kept going. Because they were holding on to something.
: What are we holding onto, Sam?
: That there's some good in this world, Mr. Frodo... and it's worth fighting for." - The Two Towers


Auntie sezzzzzz... said...

"Just no holes, okay?"

Sounds like the best approach, to under wear!!! What else is necessary?

Don't ladies-around-our-age, wear all cotton, old-lady-pants, anyway? Ahemmmmmm.... Well, this one does.

Potatoes and chicken! Your craving, hu? Kind of like pickles, for the pregnant... -chuckle- But yes, potatoes and chicken are gonna' do well by you. Protein and starch. Helping to pump up the body, during much, much stress.

Sense of Humor. Wonderful. But not always easy. I hope having your Dear Goat Pal, be your writer, helps along this line though. And I'm sure it does.

Lots of gentle hugs........

Marigold said...

Dear Auntie,
Yes. No holes. Too many things can fall out. As for the 'Dear Goat Pal'...hey, now. You don't believe I am writing all this? I see you are in the 'Oh, ye of little faith' category. :) Now then. Don't you want to place a bet on the Goatfather/Chicken odds? I want to become a rich goat.

DebH said...

Oh I can so agree on that chicken epidemic. I do believe potatoes and breads are a hit also, but that could just be me. And humor, I think I mentioned it before but you got it by the boatloads. You'll fly through this with chicken wings for sure!! I think your darlin husband is going to go along with the chicken assault for some time myself. Its funny how much Thunder you can attract with the "C" word...not like I used it or anything, but when it came to "gosh those windows need washing" or "Oh my, but the goats need toenails trimmed" it worked like a charm. Course just use it on close family, friends start to avoid you after awhile. I teased my Father terribly after I had started chemo in that he "Stole my Thunder" as he was diagnosed with esophagus cancer. He was coming out of surgery and I had just had my bald head shaved proper. I snatched off my wig when he was just awake in recover and he frankly forgot about his own pain for a bit. I teased him about trying to hog all the attention. It worked...he's still with us some 10yrs later also! Humor, while twisted is a wonderful medicine!
I sure hope you can conquer that bone pain...I feel for you. Keep telling the Dr's about all your pains. But if its any consellation maybe its kicking the hay out of Cancer already!

Millie said...

Oh, my dear goatmother, you amaze us here. You have given us so much strength as we've gone through a rough year. We can always come here and find strength through your great sense of humor and positive attitude.

Candy C. said...

Wait a minute, the Goatmother has pants without barn stains?!? How DOES she do it?!?
The two to one odds sounds pretty good but I think it would still be a losing bet, the Goatfather is gonna CAVE!! Although, potatoes and chicken sounds pretty darn good to me! :)
A sense of humor is always a good thing to have, it will see you through many a tough time. I can see how it would be especially important for the Goatmother right now though. Give her a gentle butt for me Marigold, just so she knows I'm thinking of her!

Goat Girls Rule! said...

Just add chocolate, butter and red wine and surely you'll have the 5 major food groups....

J (mad at chemo) said...

After this, the goatmother can say, "this is giving me bone pain," and mean it.

And she will also be able to say, "I love you like chicken and potatoes."

Only those who are part of the secret BC society will KNOW what the references imply.

It is a good thing, Marigold, that you are taking notes.

Marigold said...

Dear DebH,
Cracking up here! The Goatmother read the Goatfather the part about attracting the Thunder...when she got all finished, she said, 'Funny, huh?'...to which the Goatfather replied, 'Huh? I wasn't listening.'! Ha! But I want you to know the Goatfather has already declared a moratorium on chicken. :)

Marigold said...

Dear Millie,
Thank you. You have certainly had your share of hardships this year, but you've come through it all with flying colors because that's the kind of person you are! And what kind of person would that be? GREAT!, of course! :) You give so much of yourself to others. You are one of the cherished in our book. :)

Marigold said...

Dear Candy,
I'm gonna' be a rich goat. The Goatfather has already said he doesn't think he can eat anymore chicken. :) I see lots of Peanuts in my future...especially since he's taking care of us goaties right now and I caught him in the barn eating a non-chicken granola bar. Not that I'd resort to blackmail or anything. I'm just sayin' ...

Marigold said...

Dear Goat Girl Rule,
We may have to consider restacking the food pyramid. What do you think?

Marigold said...

Dear J,
Of course I'm taking notes! What kind of a friend would I be if I didn't take notes. I do think, however, we should also add 'I love you like Peanuts' to that repertoire. On the other hand, Nah. No one could be loved like Peanuts. That would be unnatural.

Mrs. Micawber said...

Presentable underwear is indeed a very worthy goal. (I need to adopt the "no holes" approach instead of keeping things until they fall apart).

The bone pain sounds rather dreadful. Is it anything like when you have the flu and your teeth hurt? Only all over? It's funny how we don't notice so many of our body parts until they do hurt. May your bones soon become (once again) the strong, silent type.

A sense of humour is WAY better than beauty - or cash. Beauty fades, and money is soon spent, but laughter lasts.

And to your very excellent LOTR quote I will append this one:

Sam: What we need is a few good taters.
Gollum: What's taters, precious? What's taters, eh?
Sam: Po-tay-toes! Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew... Lovely big golden chips with a nice piece of fried fish (or chicken). Even you couldn't say no to that.

May the Goatmother's potato bin be ever full, and her chicken always tender!

Marigold said...

Dear Mrs. Micawber,
You are wise beyond belief. I do hope Mr. Micawber appreciates what he lives with. I suppose everyone is different, but the Goatmother's bone pain was in the form of sharp shooting pains in the lower back and upper legs and hips. I like the idea of the 'strong and silent type'. But most of all we love your LOTR quotation. We had forgotten about this one (how could we?). I MUST make sure the Goatfather sees it. I just KNOW how much he'll appreciate it. :) :) :)

denise f said...

I know you are fond of quoted from the "Hobbit" et al, but may I present some Alice in Wonderland???
Insofar as knowing what to do with all of this cancer hooey:

“Begin at the beginning and go on till you come to the end; then stop”

Marigold said...

Dear Denise,
I do love LOTR quotations. Nonetheless, I like all quotations and YOURS is a superior one. I like it very much and I shall have to print it off for the Goatmother. Who knows? You may even have prompted a new trend. :)

Snowcatcher said...

I wish I lived close enough to treat the goatmother to my homemade noodles and chicken soup!!!

I think about the goatmother all the time and hope she is doing okay. Lots of positive thoughts still coming her way.